While many of us high-brow religioso types rely upon such technological achievements such as the Wrestler Name Generator to conjure up that oh-so-perfect terrifying pseudonym to score some major laughs next time your inputting in your motzai-shabbat Bowling name, picking an AOL Screen Name (do people not on To Catch A Predator still even do this?), maybe choosing a clever Jdate profile name (Hot4Accountants), or more appropriately, for you guys, to conjure fear when choosing a kickass name for your fantasy football team…
either way Israel's only religious Olympian has no need for such mishugas.
Her name: Bat-El Gaterer (Seriously, how effin awesome is that name? The BATTLE GATORER!! Bring it on US Gomez family, or better yet, let's cut the crap and take down Bindy Irwin!)
Her sport: Taekwondo. (hottest name on jdate: HotFrumTaekwondoOlympian)
Her age: 20
Shomer Negiah? 100%, except when she's kicking heads (2 points) stomachs (1 point) and ass (unclear on official Olympic scoring) during her intensive Taekwondo Olympic training. Honestly, she could care less whether you're male, female or Iranian
Where you'll see her: Bejing Olympics
What she'll be eating: According to Ynet, she can't seem to find a kosher powerbar anywhere (and one wonders why Israel hasn't won more than one gold medal yet) so she goes for the next best thing: Kosher Instant noodles. Just add water, chabibi (IS this girl perfect or what??) then again, she may just hit up this restaurant
What she'll do on shabbos: Kick shabbos-goy butt. (better than Amira lAkum? discuss) But seriously, she won't be fighting on shabbos according to her Olympic schedule although halachically, she finds it totally cool . She tells Ynet: “I compete on Saturdays,” Gaterer answered frankly. “I don't see a contradiction. I don't drive to the competitions, they're no a monetary prizes, the referees are gentiles. The only issue is food and I bring hot (instant) cups because there's no kosher food.” )
Either way we're psyched to see how our Tradition Soup eating, Olympic Taekwondoing, frummette rocks out, we worship her name, love her religiosity and we're definitely hoping she goes for the gold – also we thank her as a Jewish People, for we now all know what we are naming our fantasy football teams this summer.